Glitter. Why Did it Have to Be Glitter?

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For those of you who have raised children, you know that I am not exaggerating when I say that glitter is the herpes of your kids’ craft supplies.

For about a decade, I regularly found glitter on my face and stuck to odd parts of my body. And, if truth be told, I have passed glitter into our county’s solid waste stream.

Today I removed the top layer of flooring from behind the bar.

Today I removed the top layer of flooring from behind the bar.

So today I was starting some new demolition work at our new building and was concerned, nay – alarmed, to find some of the countertops painted purple with gold glitter. Then, as I was pulling up the fake plastic floor at the front of the storefront, I found that the antique heating registers were also glitter-studded.

The front flooring of the storefront. Plastic floor – gone. Tile.... ugh.

The front flooring of the storefront. Plastic floor – gone. Tile…. ugh.

I came home tonight and checked myself for glitter, pawing through my furry bits like I was looking for ticks.

So far, I’m clean.

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But as I was removing the black curtains from under the bar, I encountered a bad omen. A disco ball – the ovary of the glitter world. It’s ours. Unless you come and claim it.

— Christopher Schwarz

About Lost Art Press

Publisher of woodworking books and videos specializing in hand tool techniques.
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25 Responses to Glitter. Why Did it Have to Be Glitter?

  1. momist says:

    I have just finished watching Strictly Come Dancing (UK version of Dancing With the Stars) results show. I’m in the mood for glitter. If only I could come and relieve you of that ball . . .

  2. Why don’t you bring the ball to FORP? The work might seem easier.

  3. Narayan says:

    I kind of like your new place even more now that I know it has been pre-glittered. Makes my life easier.

  4. hgordon4 says:

    So true… About kids and glitter. It’s the kudzu of the craft world.

    • bearkatwood says:

      Disco, the other lost art. From: Lost Art Press To: bearkat_wood@yahoo.com Sent: Sunday, November 1, 2015 3:00 PM Subject: [New comment] Glitter. Why Did it Have to Be Glitter? #yiv5355933735 a:hover {color:red;}#yiv5355933735 a {text-decoration:none;color:#0088cc;}#yiv5355933735 a.yiv5355933735primaryactionlink:link, #yiv5355933735 a.yiv5355933735primaryactionlink:visited {background-color:#2585B2;color:#fff;}#yiv5355933735 a.yiv5355933735primaryactionlink:hover, #yiv5355933735 a.yiv5355933735primaryactionlink:active {background-color:#11729E;color:#fff;}#yiv5355933735 WordPress.com hgordon4 commented: “So true… About kids and glitter. It’s the kudzu of the craft world.” | |

  5. Scott Albert says:

    When I cleaned out behind a an old bar I found dozens and dozens of nickels and pennies from back when beer cost only that much, way better’n glitter!

  6. raney says:

    That disco ball needs to be in my shop. Next to my Shaun Cassidy poster.

  7. Brad says:

    Never underestimate the soft raking light cast from a quality disco ball!

    Worst case, Marco Terenzi could use one of those mirrors for bookmatching his veneer work!

  8. Niels Cosman says:

    Four years ago, The use and distribution of glitter (“hippy-herpes”) was banned at the Pilchuck Glass School. Three years later, I was still finding bits of the filthy-bedazzlement in my toolbox and suitcase. Occasional outbreaks withstanding, it seems to mostly have subsided.

  9. waltamb says:

    That’s exactly what my workshop was missing… a Disco Ball. I’ll take it! It will be perfect with all the Man Glitter I have here.

  10. erikhinkston says:

    You ah funny man Schwarz, a very funny man. HA!

  11. stevevoigt says:

    You’ll feel better if you watch the Heart of Glass video, especially right at the two-minute mark.

  12. tpier says:

    You bought a bar previously frequented by lesbians, you didn’t think there would be glitter?

  13. robert725 says:

    You’re meddling with powers you can’t possibly comprehend.

  14. Terry Day says:

    The disco ball find sounds like an object for 12 gauge therapy, or which ever preferred choice in calibers. This therapy also works well for tool shaped objects.

  15. jenohdit says:

    The asbesto fibers from the tile are doing the same thing unseen.

  16. Bob Jones says:

    Glitter and cat hair. Always present.

Comments are closed.