Lost Art Press knows that healthy employees are happy employees.
To engender a new spirit of happiness among associates, Lost Art Press’s human resources department is sponsoring a new initiative that will help promote wellness among its employees, foster a friendly competitive spirit between its two corporate locations (Kentucky and Indiana) and offer up some fun prizes, too!
Each branch of the business has been instructed to appoint a “wellness leader” who will lead the charge for that office. The wellness leaders will meet with their local team members weekly, and all the corporate wellness leaders will participate in a bi-monthly conference call to compare “wellness points” and discuss the next steps for their teams.
The first wellness competition will involve consuming “whole grains,” which can reduce the risk of stroke, type 2 diabetes and heart disease. Each team will seek “wellness points” by consuming servings of whole grain. Each team will receive one point for for every serving. Examples include:
- 1/2 cup cooked brown rice or other cooked grain
- 1/2 cup cooked 100% whole-grain pasta
- 1/2 cup cooked hot cereal, such as oatmeal
- 1 ounce uncooked whole grain pasta, brown rice or other grain
- 1 slice 100% whole grain bread
- 1 very small (1 oz.) 100% whole grain muffin
- 1 cup 100% whole grain ready-to-eat cereal
How are the points tallied? At the end of every workday, employees will log into the corporate Whole Grain Gateway, where they will tally each serving of whole grain consumed during the last 24 hours. They also can download free recipes involving whole grains (try the Mexican Freekeh Chili With Beans).
The office’s wellness leader will also have administrative access to the Whole Grain Gateway so he or she can see how many wellness points have been earned by each team member and encourage more whole grain consumption among employees and ensure 100 percent participation.
Wellness leaders are encouraged to educate their branch employees on the benefits of whole grains. Examples of education include holding a “Whole Grain Fair” on-site where employees can examine whole grains, try different dishes and ask questions of dieticians. Example two: Wellness leaders can also create quizzes and games available through the Whole Grain Gateway for employees to explore.
During the bi-monthly conference call, the wellness leaders will compare wellness points earned by the two branches. At the end of every fiscal quarter, corporate Lost Art Press will award gift certificates to members of the winning team, including $5 gift cards to Subway and $20 gift cards to Whole Foods.
This is just the first of many wellness initiatives planned for Lost Art Press employees in the coming year. Look for upcoming competitions involving pedometers, on-site blood pressure checks and weekly weigh-ins!
— Lost Art Press Human Resources
Does the hops they make beer with count ?
You must be having a laugh! Nothing is more guaranteed to cause strokes, type 2 diabetes and heart disease than carbohydrates, and we in the West consume up to 10 times the safe amount.
I know this is one of your wind ups Chris! But, I’m not 100% getting the joke. Perhaps one of you kind Americans can explain…
I think kendewitt608 is on the right track, but my guess is more along these lines: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Grain_whisky
….So you’re going for more curries with John \o/
Oh man I was sure the “whole grain” list options was going to sneak in “whole grain” beer somehow. What gives? >
What? An imperial pint of oatmeal stout doesn’t count as a serving of whole grains!?
Your team members would appear to have many opportunities for improvement.
Well distilled Kentucky Bourbon is a fine source of whole grainns
As my old algebra teacher used to say, “put down the bong and impish your homework.”
*finish
It was funnier the other way. I figured you had algebra around 1971. 🙂
To LAP Human Resources, I believe Chris Schwarz would prefer to consume his Contest whole grains in their fermented forms. 🙂 Michael O’Brien Valley Head, AL
Sent from my iPhone 5s
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You really don’t want your family to ever talk to you do you!
Ahhhhhhhhhhhh! Scaweee Corporate speak.
You forgot to add in that the “boss” will lead the challenge by consuming X lbs of fiber (wood?) and hiking around LAP campus at 6 am every morning .. employees are welcome.
😉
This whole post generated an unpleasant clenching of my nether regions.
more meetings! More conference calls! More status update calls re: status of arranging more meetings!
Same here, but mostly because it is eerily similar in concept to the hoops through which I must jump in order to receive an increased monetary amount in my HSA. It’s life draining, man.
Such conscientious fiber intake will no doubt improve employee output.
Was LAP out of compliance with The Affordable Healthcare Act?
Perhaps this would be more funny, If I didn’t get this type of “communication” on weekly basis.
Companies get reductions on health insurance premiums by sponsoring wellness initiatives for employees and showing good participation. While each initiative is in some way “good” for the employees, The overall tone is strongly intrusive nagging.This is only going to get worse over time.
it’s really the worst diet you can eat… you need fresh fruits and veggies and stay away from all grass grains. they will kill you. I look at it as .If it comes in a can or a jar its not real food.
oh and I like me some meat and fish.
I wholeheartedly agree. And a lot of fat for fuel. I’m still not gettin’ the joke tho’…
“Just don’t smoke,” said Yul Brynner. I don’t get the whole grain stuff post. Please explain.
Reminds me of the reasons I quit working for bigcorp and became an anarchist 35 years ago.
You joke, but you wouldn’t believe the absurdities of similar ilk in the corporate environment.
My personal favorite is that we can use our “wellness points”, which get lumped into your “reward points” (read bye bye stock purchasing plan), to purchase such awesome things as a membership to the “bacon of the month club”………
You must be very bored… get thee to the shop now!
Where will you publish the weekly results? Are you competing via MyFitnessPal etc? Please make the weigh-ins public. First man to weigh less than half the mass of his bench wins!
Speaking of grains… how about grits? I thought you had posted your go-to recipe some time ago but now I can’t find it.
That chili looks pretty good. http://wholegrainscouncil.org/node/11214/print
LOL your HR department spells “dietitian” with a “c” – which hasn’t been used in this country since the ’50s. Charming! 😀
This plan requires more quinoa and no meat.
hahahahahahahaha. If you need help getting single sign-on working with the Whole Grain Gateway site let me know. I’m available after my 2pm call tomorrow to meet with your IT team plus 25 others of your choosing.
This made me laugh – but be careful Chris – you are just a bit too good at the HR spiel – suddenly in the context of bowel movements your dragon foot, bamboo pole, little mouse, Chinese boy, Prune Candy makes sense…
It was a little too straight. I got some congratulatory DMs on Twitter from wellness firms….
Also, I think all members of the winning team should win a free colonoscopy.
Good Grief, Chris obviously has too much time on his hands (said the pot to the kettle 🙂
As someone who lives in the corporate world, this post strikes close to home and I would – oh wait a second while I adjust the pedometer that I must where for the next two months so I can get a $25 Amazon gift card.
You get gift cards?!
wish we could do the same for our co-workers. but alas, they told me they’ve got a business to run.
It’s important to have a career to fall back on – when that crazy idea of publishing “actual” books on “wood” work goes tits up. I think if I was given a pedometer I would attach it to the nearest dog/cat 5 year old and be done with it.
5 year old Child – not necessarily a 5 year old cat ( although that could be possible as a last resort)
Chris,
Thanks for more reinforcement supporting my decision to retire.
I suggest a committee to combat flatulence caused by excess consumption of grains .
Hilarious! Makes me want to fart a rainbow!
Will you be at Woodworks in Perth Ontario again this year?