About 11 p.m. Christmas Eve, I wrote the final paragraph of “Campaign Furniture” and closed the laptop. Megan Fitzpatrick is editing the text now, and I’m finishing up some hand drawings, photography and scanning to complete the book.
I’ll start designing the pages on Jan. 1, and the finished product should ship to customers in March 2014.
I don’t know if I’m like other writers, but I have about zero point zero confidence about my books when they’re complete. My personal criticisms of my work are worse – way worse, actually – than anything spouted on the forums or lobbed into my inbox.
If I could stop myself from writing, I probably would. Unfortunately, writing and publishing is a compulsion, much like woodworking is a compulsion for me and many of my friends. So here is my pre-publication critique of my book: It’s too short, too shallow and not really funny.
1. Too short. This book clocks in at about 50,000 words. That’s about half the length of “The Anarchist’s Tool Chest.” I did everything I could to condense my thoughts and control my asides for “Campaign Furniture.” A lot of the information in “Campaign Furniture” is visual. There are hundreds of photos, drawings and scans of historical material.
My urge was to write an opus. I certainly have the material to do that. But I don’t have time to read an opus, and I know that many readers have lives that are as crazy busy as mine.
2. Too shallow. Here’s a confession: While I admire academic books and use them in my research, I do not enjoy reading them for fun. I am not an academic. I don’t write like one, I don’t think like one and I could never be one.
So while this book will have an index, a bibliography and some deep appendices, it is not going to impress a librarian or end up quoted in someone’s master’s thesis. The goal of “Campaign Furniture” is to introduce you to the style and – I hope – get you interested in building these pieces.
Campaign furniture, as you will see, is made with top-shelf joinery, beautiful woods and its only real adornment is brasses, which also reinforce the joinery. It is an under-appreciated style, and so much fun to build.
3. Not funny. I think good writing balances information and entertainment. But after writing several chapters in the same frame of mind as “The Anarchist’s Tool Chest,” I ended up rewriting them because the tone just seemed wrong. I find it weird to make jokes about the Napoleonic Wars, colonialism or severe urban overcrowding – all of which are part of the story of campaign furniture.
Some of the darkest and wrongest humor ended up on the cutting room floor. Here’s one bit that got cut. It’s too funny and sick and wrong not to share.
Attention, if you are easily offended, stop reading.
Sir Pratnap Singh, the Maharaja of Idar, was intent on wiping out the Muslim population of India. When an English official pointed out that they shared some Muslim friends, Pratnap replied: “Yes, I liking them too, but very much liking them dead.”
I know. It’s horrible on so many levels.
Despite my self-loathing, I do hope you’ll read the book and join me in researching and building in this fascinating style. I can already think of three more books about the campaign style that need to be written, and I hope this book sparks enough interest for me to continue my work.
— Christopher Schwarz
Merry Christmas
I am looking forward to the book, If it is written just a little like you usually do, it will be well worth reading.
Brgds
Jonas
Amen. I’m eagerly awaiting Furniture of Necessity.
Not discounting this book in any way, I’m sure it’s fantastic; but I’m REALLY anxious to see Furniture of Necessity come to fruition.
I hope that is the next one up!
You should…sorry, couldn’t resist…
I think you are too hard on yourself. I have read both of your workbench books and the Anarchist book. I enjoyed all three. You have a definite offbeat style of writing. I enjoy it very much, a nice change from the usually dry and take yourself too seriously woodworking books. The information is there, but the audience is entertained in the process.
I teach continuing education to worker’s compensation attorneys and am accredited by the State Bar of California. Yeah, I know, exciting topic to teach for four hours at a shot. I find that with a topic as potentially dry: who am I kidding, it is dry…that you must add levity or the class will fall asleep. So my jokes range from corny to downright silly, but the audience is grateful. No one expects a topic like mine to be entertaining. Most come in expecting a root canal like experience and leave actually having learned something.
Woodworking instruction books can be dry as well. Even when you love the topic, the delivery is a lot of the time done by someone who is great at woodworking and just ok at writing. They are separate skills, like teaching and whatever it is you are teaching about. I feel you have both. You know the topic and have the ability to convey the information in a manner that the audience can understand and more importantly, will remember because they were entertained in the process.
But you will not please everyone. You will always come across those who are much too straight in there demeanor and do not enjoy offbeat and slightly irreverent humor. They can read the other books that are out there. I for one, appreciate what you do and encourage you to continue.
Thanks,
Tim Null
Stop apologizing. You’re not Canadian.
…and I’m sorry your not. (sorry about that)
You should quit worrying and let the market be your guide. If it really stinks, you can write new chapters online to extirpate your guilt.
Congratulations on making your deadline! While I hate to hear about anything being cut or omitted, I realize without an endpoint projects often do not get completed and thus serve no one (hey Fitz, complex and compound enough for you?).
Completely agree with the Jonas and Jamie.
Aren’t you cute!
Chris,
I love this series you doing. As a 18th Century Reenactor. I am dying to make some of this furniture to put in my marquee. Then take the make do junk I have and put in storage!
Hey Winston, Anyone with a MkII must be a “Reenactor.” They are wonderfullagrivatingtantilizingpissingoff creations much like Chris’ books. Chris, keep them coming if for no other reason than the mental health of your faithful and keeping Megan occupied:-)
Dick
Academia in general would be at least two orders of magnitude better if only a few academics had the enthusiasm and grasp of their respective subject that you do for furniture and wood working. You’re an excellent teacher and I’m blessed, like everyone else, to learn from you. Can’t wait for this book. When’s the next campaign furniture class?
Academic books are like software: once you write it, you are never free of it. Make small changes and then sell it again is the name of the game. 🙂
There is room between the opus and an issue of a magazine that needs to be filled. A lot of the books I read are like two hour specials of {pick your favorite magazine here}. Instead of three or four diverse projects they’ll have six to fifteen themed projects. All to often there is very little information on the how or why behind the projects. I love Walker and Tolpin’s By Hand And Eye because they break the mold.
When can we place an order? This is like buying “Futures” but much better than hog bellies.
Dick Culp
I particularly enjoy the humor in your writing. Seems to me that it’s part of your writing style. Hopefully this book won’t read like it’s written by a standin.
Oh Chris….Thou doth self-deprecate too much. But I guess our biggest critics are usually ourselves. I nearly burn every project I make. Luckily I have my wife to blow out the match…
Are you going to dedicate this book to the memory of Raney?
Please let this unfortunate incident fade from memory.
I quit worrying about what librarians thought when one of our local branches re-opened after renovations and I saw this sign:
“DVD’s”